Most vending machines reluctantly dispense Dr. Peppers and Doritos. The apparatus at the Mondrian South Beach, however, would never condescend to offer you a soda. Instead, a space age wall that looks more like a Shu Uemura store front greets unsuspecting guests in the cavernous lobby. Unless you have a black card, stay away as change just won’t cut it. Options, which you select from a computer screen and pay for by credit, include Bentleys, Thakoon dresses, and a $250 keychain. My favorite – a corner unit in the Mondrian residences for a cool $1,261,500. Business has been good apparently. Concierge Andres Gomez told me they sold out of the ‘F*ck the Recession’ tee in 2 days. For some reason, I’d hate to be a drunk boarder wandering back to my room jonesing for a Sprite. I might just end up with my own building.

- Via ASW by Kristian Laliberte during Art Basel